CHILDREN AS CONFIDANTES

In the midst of separation children are always affected, even though parents often think they are shielding the child from their adult problems.  It might be negative words said to them about the other parent or a conversation that a child is exposed to rather than adults talking their problems though with another adult.

Ø      Children are not mini adults.  Their minds do not have the ability to discern what they should or not hear, see, read, say or be expected to respond to.

Ø      When parents include their children in parental squabbles, the child may feel as though they are:

a)     in some way responsible

b)     required to take sides when they are unable to do so

c)      respond in some way to make their parent feel better

Parents should protect their children from age-inappropriate conversation by ensuring they relay their concerns and problems to another adult - preferably someone who can offer real help.