So often we, as parents, struggle in our efforts to successfully lead our families.
Here are some of the reasons why:
- We get the impression that other families are working way better than ours.
that are working well together look and act happy inside and outside their home.
The children from these families are respectful to one another and behave well with
and without their parents being around.
- We may have chosen a marriage partner whose beliefs, expectations and methods of
In this case, we need to take all the necessary steps to find common ground for the sake
of the whole family.
- We made the mistake of throwing money at our kids instead of giving them the necessary
Kids don’t value stuff as much as they value our time and attention.
- We got caught up in the myth that if we work excessive hours we can give our kids
See comment above.
- We tried to be a friend to our kids and not a parent.
to act and to be their role model.
- We thought that if we said 'No' to our child they would not like us.
because they know you care.
- We used our own parents’ model for parenting, not realizing there was any other way.
excellent feedback from others, then that modeling is fine. However, if you are not getting
the desired results, you need to get help and training so that you can model and teach more
- We never made our core family values clear to our kids or maybe hadn't even clarified
It is vital to harmonious, effective parenting to create a list of principles or values you want
your family to live by and be known for. Now teach these values.
- We were never told that it was our job to shape our kids to become extraordinary adults.
It is the parents’ job to train their children to become productive, respectful, responsible
and trustworthy adults, who will themselves become great parents.
- We became a family that was inward looking and somewhat selfish rather than outward
We believe that successful families are parent directed, family oriented and outwardly
focused. This means that we choose to make a positive difference to those in the community
- We thought we were admitting failure if we asked for advice.
with little or no training. It is, therefore, extremely wise for all parents to seek ongoing
information and training on how to best manage their families. If not, it is possible to fail.
- We were slow in getting support for a disability or disorder our child was born with or
There is a great deal of support and help offered to parents of disabled children. We can
only encourage these parents to get all the help they can get for the whole family’s sake.
- We now see that our thoughts and goals were more on ourselves than on what was best
Once this realization has occurred, it is important to seek help as soon as possible from
- One (or more) of our children was born with a strong will or some disorder that shattered
Many families find they have children with either a strong will, ADHD, autism or some
other behavioral challenge. Fortunately, there is a great deal of help through schools,
community agencies, and programming to help these children lead and fit into normal life.
What others think...
- There's almost no encouragement along the way or people to give us a 'Hurrah!'
- People can be so negative and snide, making us feel discouraged and think
- Our own parents don't always agree with how we are raising their grandkids!
- There's so many 'parenting experts' out there. We thought they must know
- Unlike obtaining a driver's license, there's no training and no test to determine
It is very important to encourage parents when we see they are doing a great job with
their kids. We need to avoid criticism, but rather offer objective help or resources.
'Kids don't come with manuals'. Now isn't that strange? That's the name of a book I wrote and is available from our website. Why don't you buy it today? 'It's never too late!' We have a free e-booklet available with that title on the website, too. Buy a book, get an e-booklet free!
Written by Brian and Sally Burgess