HOW DO KIDS LEARN BY THEIR MISTAKES?

 
Everyone makes mistakes.  It is an imperfect world.
Here are some pointers to make the best of a situation.

Preparation:

• Have you told your child the right way?
• Have you modeled how to do it, or how to make the right decision?
• Have you given him/her opportunity to practice?
• Have you given them a ‘safe place to land’ if they mess up?
• Have you encouraged them to talk about their hesitation or fear of making a mistake?
• Have you made the expectations so high that they just can't live up to them? = auto fail
• Do you tend to condemn them for stupidity rather than hold your temper? = fear to confess.
• Create a 'salvage plan' for when mistakes occur and follow it objectively.

After the fact:

• Get all the facts right - allow them to explain in their own way and time. 
• What actually happened? Piece the story together.
• Allow them to explain their reasoning for their actions at the time.
• Talk about their actions and why the situation turned out wrong.
• Refer to your ‘salvage plan’ and follow it e.g.

           a. Summarize the facts.
           b. Get the child to apologize to the appropriate person for their mistake.
           c. Have them make amends if something got broken, money was wasted or whatever.
           d. Ensure they know what to do next time.
           e. Praise them for getting it right.
           f. Give them responsibility in that area in the future.


Remember that these are children on a huge learning curve, just like you were.
Go easy on them. A mistake is unintentional and different from defiance.

Written by Sally Burgess