It is the hardest thing in the world sometimes to have your kids listen and do as you ask them THE FIRST TIME.
Is it impossible? No!
Why don't my kids listen to me?Because:
- They are concentrating on something else and, therefore, are not aware you are talking to them.
- They know that you will ask many times before you really mean business.
- They have a hearing difficulty.
- They choose not to do as you say which is straight disobedience.
- Know that you will only carry out a threat occasionally, so they hope you will give up and do it yourself.
How do I train my kids to LISTEN and OBEY?a) Check and see what they are doing, and, if they are absorbed, wait till they have finished what they
are doing before you ask them to do something.
b) Tell them that in 10 minutes they must stop what they are doing and clean up/put their toys away
c) Once you know you have their attention, tell them that you will ask only once and if they do not
do as you ask there will be a consequence. Tell them what that consequence will be. Carry it out.
d) If you think they may have a genuine hearing problem, get their ears checked.
DO NOT PLEAD. This gives the impression that they have an option when they don't.
DO NOT NAG. This tells them they have as much time as they want to do as you say.
DO NOT SHOUT. This only tells them that they can shout also when they want something.
Allowing yourself to get angry only leads to regret. You cannot take back
words spoken in anger.
BE CONSISTENT. Your kids feel secure when you say what you mean and mean what you say!
They want to know your response will be the same every time. Both parents'
expectations need to be the same.
Written by Sally Burgess, Forefront Families LLC